At night when the sky is clear I love to look at the stars, I remember doing this as a child and thinking how big the world was. I now look at the stars and feel gratitude for my life and family. By the time my third child was born I thought I had a pretty good handle on what being a mother was all about. That changed one Sunday morning when I found my third child at 11 months of age in his cot. He was laying on his back, breathing heavily and his little body was convulsing like he was having a terrible nightmare. I just could not get him to wake up. This was the moment that my life as a mother changed forever.

The paramedics working on your son on the lounge room floor while you watch in a state of shock, the questions that you are unable to answer, “Did he swallow something?” “Did he have a fall and hit his head?” and the ambulance ride was a blur. The emergency room was full of medical staff all trying to get him to rouse. Asking me as mom to speak to him to get him to wake, but I was in a such a state of shock, I was unable to speak.